OK Universe I Hear You!!!

I'm pretty sure this is going to turn into a rambling post, but I need to get this out. I am in need of a major change, a change in both my insides and outsides.

Image found on Google, words added by Ash-Lynn

My Insides...

Are messed up and twisted, I feel like something is missing or lost in me; but what? I know it's not in my marriage, that part of my life is amazing, in fact my personal life is pretty good right now; the only major thing that is a constant in my life is family drama, but we all have that from time to time.

I think, no I know the only thing I have been lacking in lately is my spiritual side, I have spent so much time in the past few years trying to get my health back on track that I let that side of me slide.

I know from how loud the universe is yelling at me that I need to get back on track and back in balance with my spiritual side and with the universe. I'm not sure how I'm going to do this yet but I do know I'm going to reconnect and find this part of me again. I'm going to start this by getting back to the basics and letting the universe guide me from there.

My Outsides...

Are in need of a complete makeover, I need to drop at least 50lbs and tone this jelly belly up a lot. I have had a lot of changes with my body in the past six months. In late June, early July I was diagnosed with Supraventricular Tachycardia(SVT) and was put on a beta blocker to help slow down and regulate my heart, the down side to this is beta blocker have an awful side effect, hunger ie weight gain; and this sucks.

I have put on 30lbs on top on the weight I already needed to lose, and that's not cool. I have cried over this and been depressed about it for a while, buy now I am going to stop whining and do something about it.

So starting with the new year I will be giving myself over, on both my insides and outsides, I am determined to get my weight down, and keep my diabetes in check; I'll be eating even healthier than I already do(been slipping on that too) and exercising my butt of(literally). The hubby says he will help me and fully support me in this and help me stay on track.

In the new year I hope to find a new me, and maybe just maybe find parts of me that I thought I had lost to me forever.

Do you ever feel like your lost or in need of a change?