Sorry, Not Sorry

I don't know about you guys, but i have been saying sorry way to much lately and I'm done.

I'm done with saying I'm sorry, when others are at fault, step up and take responsibility for what you do and say. Don't call me names and put me down, then cover your drunk, pill popping ass by telling the world how I did you wrong; then want me to say sorry. 

Don't call me and cry on my shoulder and pull the "but we are family card" and get me to say oh it's ok. 

I know the statements above may sound harsh, but after 45 years of my family telling me "you have to be friends, she needs you, cousins are supposed to be best friends and quilting me into doing what they say I should again and again; I just can't anymore. 

I am tired both mentally and physically, you can only pick a person up off the ground so many times, before you walk away and leave them laying there.  

I can't answer the phone at 3am only to here slurring of words and you wanting me to tell you it's ok you're not a bad person; I'm done being your enabler. 

I'm done with having the same conversation over and over because you either can't remember or hope I'll change my mind. 

I'm done being told I thought you loved me enough to do this or that. Love has nothing to do with it. 

I'm done being made the bad guy because I won't cave to your wishes. 

I'm done with the stress, depression, and self loathing this relationship and family has gifted me with my whole life. 

I am done living a life that keeps me so stressed that I spend days in bed with migraines, from today forward I live my life my way, on my own terms and no one else's; today I hand all of this mess over to the universe/Goddess/God, it's not my headache anymore.

Demi Lovato sums up my feelings with "Sorry, I'm Not Sorry"

Thanks for listening for another rant

Love you guys

Ashley